Insomnia and Heavy Thoughts

It's 4:30 in the morning. Luckily for me, today is Diadeloso (Day of the Bear) at Baylor, meaning all classes are cancelled. How cool is that? Baylor gives us a day's reprieve to just have some good old fashion fun. They bring in live musicians, really notable ones I might add (Matt Maher played two years ago I think), serve some good food, play some great games/sports, and a whole bunch of other stuff...all for free! But for the tuition we pay here, it better be. Unfortunately, despite the fact that this is a Christian university with certain expectations, it is still a college, meaning many people will spend most of the day (and all night) having a different kind of "fun". I've never been one to participate in such activities, so my night will be rather lonely, but I'm ok with that.

Growing up, I was always different from my peers (even my church friends), and I never found the necessity to participate in the traditional American teenager pastimes. That difference extended into my collegiate life, where I was definitely much more different. It always surprises people when I tell them that my first sip of alcohol was not until I was 21. And since then, drinking is still not at the top of my list of "fun" things to do. Before and after that momentous birthday, I'm uncomfortable in those social situations, especially when minors are present, so I avoid them at all cost. All I can do is pray that my friends are safe. So yeah...always been different.

So it's not 4:45am, and I still can't sleep, so I'm spending my time ranting blogging about random things....or maybe not so random things. Unfortunately, I have undiagnosed insomnia (lol) which is a terrible thing to have for a college student. So more often than not, I find myself not being able to sleep like a normal person, meaning sleeping before 2am. Which is why I'm really glad that we the day off tomorrow...or today. During the bouts of sleeplessnes, I find myself wandering the web for something interesting to read, which finally brings me to the topic of this particular post.

I was reading a bunch of different Catholic blogs earlier, all much, much, much, better than mine. And there was a common theme I noticed. Now before I say this next part, I want to state that I am in no way trying to offend any blogger that may happen to stumble upon this particular post. It is not a comment as to the quality of any one blog. It is simply an observation. But from what I've read, Catholic bloggers really really like to complain. Like a lot! Again, I'm really not trying to offend anyone, just pure observation. Catholic bloggers really do like to complain...and they like to complain about a variety of things. Now most of these bloggers, as far as I can tell, are very devout Catholics and secure in their faith, otherwise why would they be blogging in the first place? Some topics are about the differences in the liturgy, others are about traditionalist vs. non-traditionalist views. Many talk about all the things other Catholics are doing wrong, while others comment on the current status of the Church. But whatever the topic is, we (yes, I am now including myself in the Catholic bloggers group) like to complain. And each blogger thinks that their particular complaint/criticism/opinion is the correct one. The funny thing is, many of these bloggers will often contradict each other. But you know what...in my humble opinion, I think that's one of the beauties of the Church.

We each draw from our various cultures, backgrounds, ways of life, and experiences. And from these, our opinions and preferences are shaped and nuanced. Some older generation Catholics love the Ordinary Form of the Mass, while some younger Catholics are being drawn to the Extraordinary Form. [I love both: I normally attend Daily and Sunday Masses in the Ordinary Form, but there are just some days that I feel the need to go to our local Latin Mass]. There are Catholics who have readily accepted and adapted to the 3rd Edition of the Roman Missal (this really applies to Stateside Catholics, and any language that translated from the English instead of the Latin), while there are a number of Catholics who have openly vocalized their strong dislike for the new translation. [Knowing my love for the Latin Mass, I absolutely love the new translation, but I will concede that it does definitely take longer to say some things than before. Lol. That's just a fact]. Everyone has their own view of how the Liturgy should be and look like. Differences in opinions in homiletics, liturgical music, and religious education dominate the blogosphere. But as I said before, I think this is a beauty of the Church. Even with all our differing opinions, we can still call ourselves Catholic, the Universal Church.

But this post does come with a warning/disclaimer. There are few blog posts, and I cannot emphasize enough how few, that just don't seem theologically sound. Now while the nuanced differences in theology are ok (to a degree), the one thing that all Catholics (most especially bloggers) should be in agreement with are the doctrines, dogmas, and basic Catechism of the Catholic Church. In regards to the sanctity of life, the Sacraments, the Mass, our Creeds, and all other basic teachings of the faith, there is not any leeway for disagreement. Our dogmas and teachings have been given to us through Divine Revelation, whether in Sacred Scripture or Sacred Tradition. There is no flip-flopping, waffling, side-changing, or conceding when it comes to our catechism. This next part will be honestly blunt, and may be offensive, but only to those who are guilty of the aforementioned waffling. Contraception, abortion, woman priests, disregarding any of the Sacraments, etc, are all inconsistent with the Catholic faith. In short, those cafeteria Catholics who pick and choose what beliefs and teachings are convenient for them, are not truly Catholic. Gasp! Shock! What is he saying?!

Being Catholic is not easy, this we all know. But faith is not meant to be. I know, some of you may be asking yourselves who am I to tell you whether or not you are a true Catholic. So instead, ask yourself. Are you? Now I'm not asking you whether you are a theologian, church historian, or expert. But I am asking, do you profess the Catholic faith with a basic understanding of the teachings of the Church especially in regards to the Sacraments? Honestly ask yourself this, do I believe in all those things to have been divinely revealed to Holy Mother Church, passed down through the ages, as basic tenants of the faith? I think that its this lack of true catechism that is greatest problem in the Church. All other problems stem from this.

Sure, some Catholic bloggers will argue that its the differences in liturgy or the varying practices of others that greatly divide the Church. But its not. The greatest problem in the Church today is the lukewarm, cafeteria Catholic. The ones who claim to be Catholic, but do not have a basic working knowledge of the Catechism. The ones who claim to be Catholic, but decide to pick and choose which dogmas and practices are best for them. The great problem in the Church is the one person who claims to be Catholic, and is anything but. So as a Catholic blogger, here is my complaint: if you are going to call yourself Catholic, then BE Catholic. Anything else, and you're just a simple, but dangerous hypocrite.

In an earlier post, I touched on JPII's "New Evangelization" and how that evangelization needs to begin with the re- evangelization of the people. This is how we must address this problem, this great threat. With love and renewed teaching. My heart breaks, literally breaks, when I hear in the news that the current administration is claiming that most Catholics are in disagreement with their Bishops. It breaks when I hear statistics that claim most Catholics are in favor of contraception. It breaks when I hear about Catholics who leave the faith as a result of the hypocrisy of others. It breaks when I see Catholic families going through divorce, children refusing to believe in the validity/necessity for the Sacrament of Reconciliation, people thinking that the Eucharist is just a symbol, or the increasing disbelief/skepticism/vilification of our priests (this one hurts ALOT!).

Sure, we can argue about the merits of the Ordinary vs. the Extraordinary Form. We can argue about the appropriateness of receiving communion in the hand or not. We can argue about music, liturgy, church design, methods of religious education, and a whole host of other things. But the one thing that we cannot argue about is the Catechism of the Catholic Church. This is what makes us Catholic, how we are able to proudly proclaim that the Church is the Bride of Christ, how we can proudly proclaim that we make up the mystical Body of Christ, with Christ as the head. We must never stray from these teachings.

So there it is: the heavy thoughts of a sleep-deprived, insomniac college Catholic. Yes, its just one big complaint, but I think it's a complaint that we all need to be aware of. So here's the last thing I'm going to say for the night/morning/I-don't-even-know-anymore: to my Catholic friends, BE CATHOLIC...truly, devoutly, proudly, unfailingly, unashamedly, unabashedly, unwaveringly, immutably, wholly, spiritually, physically, and blatantly. Be Catholic.

Thoughts, comments, complaints, critiques, or criticisms are always welcome.

Come Holy Spirit, fill the hearts of your faithful and kindle in them the fire of your love.
V. Send forth your Spirit, and they shall be created.
R. And You shall renew the face of the earth.

Let us pray.

O, God, who by the light of the Holy Spirit, did instruct the hearts of the faithful, grant that by the same Holy Spirit we may be truly wise and ever enjoy His consolations. Through Christ Our Lord. Amen.

Pax vobiscum.